War Without Violence (even pretended)

by Fred Ray on March 13, 2009 · 4 comments

In a move sure to please pacifists everywhere, the Appleton, WI, schools have banned the mock battle from their day-long Civil War program.

The battle segment was scratched after a group of parents raised concerns it conflicts with violence-prevention efforts and a district policy banning look-alike weapons at schools.

If you don’t like history, just change it. Besides, you never know when someone’s going to commit mass murder with a replica Springfield.

You can’t make this stuff up.

I have a suggestion, though. Give everyone some S’More-flavored Schnapps, a charismatic leader, and then … on to Topeka!


If you haven’t seen the South Park episode “The Red Badge of Gayness,” you’ve missed something genuinely funny. If only we’d had more S’More-flavored Schnapps, the Yankees would never have taken Richmond!

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admin March 13, 2009 at 9:45 pm

That is a VERY funny episode Fred. “Robert E. Lee” Cartman *almost* succeeded! 🙂

elektratig March 14, 2009 at 10:02 am

We might as well ban reenactments, since there aren’t any enemy combatants anymore.

I’m sorry to say I haven’t seen the South Park episode, but what really amazes me is that Wikipedia seems to have a separate, detailed entry on each episode of the show. Now there’s obsession!

Fred Ray March 14, 2009 at 12:06 pm

The preferred term now is “Friends We Haven’t Met Yet.”

Daniel Sauerwein March 16, 2009 at 1:25 am

Honestly, I am not surprised that a WI school district would take such action, but am saddened, as reenactments are some of the best ways to introduce the war to kids. They provide a more hands on atmosphere and many kids learn a lot through tactile experiences.

BTW, I love that episode of SP (bring on the S’more flavored Schnapps).

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